Mind, Body & Soul: How Horse’s Help Women Succeed
There are two old sayings, the first is, “A dog may be man's best friend...but the horse wrote history” and the other, “Look back at our struggle for freedom, Trace our present day's strength to its source; And you'll find that man's pathway to glory, Is strewn with the bones of a horse.” Both sayings drum up images on how the horse has always been apart of man’s plan to conquer. The conquering can be that of another country or just that of land. Less than one hundred years have past since the horse was re-placed with the automobile. Up until fifty years ago, the horse was still a vital part of every farm in America. Today’s horse plays a different role, no longer a war or transportation horse, he has become a companion to both men and women. If his role in man’s life has ended, it picked up with women with whom he continues to bring forth meaning. From the little girl dreaming of her own pony, to the teenager and young adult waiting for her prince on a white horse to rescue her, to the mother, wife and career women he is a mentor and a best friend.
The horse gives his human companions independence, he teaches patience, installs trust, responsibility, how to relax, the meaning of discipline, challenge, and communication. The horse also teaches how to manage time, develop a strong work ethic, how to set goals, solve problems, and finally, he gives confidence. It is how the horse does it that is cause for a deeper investigation, and if it really does have any effect on women, with the question is the horse more than just an animal?
Out of all the animals in the animal kingdom, the horse is the closest to humans in their social hierarchy with their distinct moods and personalities. The horse is, by nature, a band animal that if given a choice wants to be with others. Sometimes the horse will choose the human companionship over the equine. To women he teaches the opposite, to be an independent spirit. More times than not, the woman and horse will develop a bond that only the two of them see. This teaches the woman to become more independent and not rely so much on the help of others. She learns how to mend fences, fix a broken water line, or a burned out fuse. This independence learned with the horse can carry over into a career, by having the woman keep her independence. In 1971, the Committee for the Maryland Hunt Cup faced a decision of letting in the first woman in the race (Burke 1). Kathy Kusner was an independent woman who was blazing the trail for others to follow her. Ms. Kusner, even at that time, was more than qualified to ride in the Cup race. She had already represented the United States in two Olympics and was twice the Woman’s World Show Jumping Champion. As with any man, Ms. Kusner took her role as an equestrienne seriously. She did not need to be defined by the men she was competing against, her independence spoke for itself.
For woman to be successful with her equine partner, she must learn patience. Often times in westerns and rodeos it is viewed that the horse must have his spirit broken to be useful, and for his spirit to be broken then force must be used. This is an incorrect assumption as the horse does not respond to force. Since a woman is not as physically strong as a man, she lacks the strength to rely on and must resort to patience and corrective training to get the desired effect. Frankie Chesler believes “that women encourage horses to listen, while men have a tendency to demand that horses listen” (Pony Boy 76). If the chosen sport is dressage, highly populated by women, the horse will not reach his potential till the age ten to even as late as twenty; all the while they listen to each other. When you look at the sport of reining, so popular among men, the horse is as young as three and burnt out by ten. It has long been suggested that in today’s world of equine sports, the horse is being asked to do too much too soon and needs time to mature and grow both physically and mentally. Patience is a strong virtue to have in any business. Not all business deals are done in one lunch meeting nor are all brainstorming sessions successful in late night meetings.
If the horse teaches patience, he also invokes a sense of trust. A horse’s vision is bio-vision, meaning each eye sees independently. Unlike the human eye that see mono-vision or one whole picture. It is because of the horse’s vision that requires him to trust his human companions. It has been said if you can place your hand in the middle of a horse’s forehead, his blind spot, he trusts you. The same can go for when a horse is asked to walk through water, with his vision he has no depth perception and relies on his human not to lead him into danger. A woman can take this trust that her horse installs in her, turn it around and apply it to her daily life. No horse just gives their trust, to earn it you must trust them, and if you can trust them you can open yourself up to trust others. It is not uncommon in today’s work environment that they play trust games, blind fold someone and have the group give them directions to the object desired. This is the same thing that is often asked of a horse. It deals with being asked to work outside of your comfort zone and how successful you are doing that.
With owning a horse, comes responsibility. Unlike a baby who will grow to take care for himself, a horse will never grow out of the three-year-old stage. He will always require his caretaker to feed him, clean up behind him, care him if he falls ill, and to make the final decision when his pain becomes too much. Not only is this a responsibility but also a commitment to the horse. Unfortunately “commitment, like loyalty, is no longer as prized it once was” (Midkiff 56). Too many times a bad business deal can be down to benefit a rival company. This is seen in everyday life when you pick up a newspaper or turn on the evening news to see a company downsizing, laying off workers, fathers skipping out on child support, mothers abandoning their children, or children simply falling through the cracks of foster care. Daily we let ourselves down and others for not owning up to our responsibilities and letting our loyalty be only to ourselves. The horse does not allow that. If a woman wishes to be successful with her horse, then she must commit to him, be disciplined, and be loyal to him, just like she would to her job and clients.
The presence of a horse can relax a person. After a hard day of work, with countless meetings, and to come home to a stressed spouse and children, the horse gives a much needed escape. Dr. Delphi M. Toth feels the same way, educated at Case Western Reserve University, Harvard University, Harvard Medical School, and the University of Virginia, she is a practicing clinical psychologist and neuropsychologist specializing in head injuries and rehabilitation in animal-related therapy, and has long been involved in equine-mediated therapeutic programs. Dr. Toth writes, “Women and girls enjoy the power and speed of horses, but they also revel in the closeness of physical and emotional contact, and tend to seek an intense one-to-one relationship with the horse as a friend, as a confidant” (Pony Boy 33). The work place is a stressful as it ever has been with competitions for promotions. It is often a place of backstabbing. Horses can allow you to relax, take a census and make the right decision. They give a new perceptive on problems and unlike a human, your secrets and fears are safe with them. Horses simply allow you to talk out your problems and not charge you the hundred dollar an hour therapy session.
With horses, goals are set to be realistic to the task at hand and with good problem solving skills you can overcome anything handed to you. Dr. Pamela L. Hamilton, a frequent speaker on the relationship between horses and women, wrote, “Most lessons in life come in unexpected packages and in unexplained terms” (Pony Boy 15). For Dr. Hamilton her goals consisted of her desire to obtain and keep her horses respect and to build her confidence up. This confidence spilled over into her personal life when she completed her undergraduate studies at Michigan State University and her PhD in psychology at Florida State University. It was also with Dr. Hamilton’s degree in psychology that helped her in training her horse with the knowledge of positive and negative reinforcement, the scheduling of reinforcement, and structuring the environment that allowed them to go undefeated in the show ring. What worked with her horse, Dr. Hamilton realized would work in her own profession and personal life if applied properly. It was also what her horse taught her when he did not cooperate in or out of the show ring that made her change her perception of a problem. This is what horses do, if you wish to accomplish something with them, you set a realistic goal and when problems arise, you learn how to solve them. This particular trait of a horse can prepare you for the business world, not to expect the deadline to come without problems and when those problems do pop up, how to successfully over come them.
Horses are a constant challenge. Melissa Sovey-Nelson wrote, “A woman on a horse becomes elevated in powerful proportion to her otherwise two-legged stature. Even as a beginning rider, it is a place of empowerment mixed with the thrill of danger. For many of us this experience opens new doors to adventure, regales the imagination and introduces us to the role of conqueror” (22). Sovey-Nelson had left a business the world of health and wellness where she studied eastern and western philosophies and counseled clients in lifestyle changes. It was not until she started riding horses that she realized that she had never put her theories into practice for herself. This became apparent after her own horse tossed her. Horses are a challenge; they have their own mind and can think against you whenever they want to. Sports involving horses are different from other sports because of that, when compared to that of a football, soccer, hockey, baseball or basketball team you are one of many. With horses it is just the two of you and to be successful you need to meet the challenge and work together. Over come obstacles, experience personal growth and become one.
Horses also force open communication. With a horse everything is in the now, a reaction is needed now, a decision is needed now, and for a horse now and later can be the difference between life and death for them. Unlike dogs and cats, when a horse is born he is not domesticated, it comes with the first days of life does he learn to accept the touch of humans. If that foal is left alone, there will be no difference between him and a wild Mustang. As the foal grows into a horse and becomes gentled to saddle, he will “perceive your feelings, perceive some of your attitudes, and certainly perceive your moods” (McCall 71). This communication is a silent one through body language that can be viewed as a threat or not. Since you cannot read their minds, nor the minds of a boss or co-worker, the key is to their body language. It is the little things that can be noticed, but often ignored, that can guide you to make the correct decision in how you approach them. You can have your head kicked off by the horse or bitten off by the co-worker if the approach is the wrong one. Horses have their personalities and moods like we do, once they are learned they can be placed into effect for us in the work place.
Time Management is a key in horse management as is a strong work ethic is needed to be successful with horses. It is in knowing how long it will take to feed, clean stalls, turn out horses, ride and get the non-horse work done in a day. It is the school work, career, and family outside of a barn and discovering the trick to the balancing act. United States Equestrian member Laura Chapot wrote that, “riding is not your typical sport; it requires dedication, persistence, and sacrifice. Yet it also brings tremendous rewards. Because riding relies more heavily on the relationship between horse and rider than on athletic power, it is a natural choice for women” (Pony Boy 160). To be a professional rider, the sacrifice is common in not having a permanent home life is spent on the road going from one show to the next. As a career women, sacrifice is also common when it takes away from family. Its knowing what you can do away with and what you cannot, and then to manage your time to fit what you cannot do without into. This requires having a strong work ethic in not just slacking off and hoping someone else will pick up your work load at work, or just hoping your horse can win that class on his own. This balance act can only pay off when it is handled with delicate hands, and then gives confidence when it all works out.
Horses give people confidence. It starts in the mind, blossoms in action, and grows with practice (Sovey-Nelson 46). When a rider first starts out they must learn how to hold the reins properly, how to post with grace, control their body in a canter, how if desired, to over come jumping. All riders fall off, it is the rider who picks themselves up off the ground, dusts themselves off and gets back on that will be more successful than the one who just gave up and never got back on. Life in general is a risk, relationships, work, family, school; everything we encounter on a daily basis is a risk. It is the confidence we gain with that risk that makes it all worth it.
Is the horse more than just an animal? The answer is yes too many people, men and women, as well as children, would all agree too. While the relationship with a horse is not identical to a relationship with another human, it does not imply to be any lesser (Pony Boy 33). The horse is a therapist who only wishes to be paid in hay and oats, a friend who will never turn his back on you, and a comedian that will always have you laughing. It is because of horses that a person can become a trusting person, a person who can read body language, and who believes in open communication to be successful. These are desired traits in anyone for any job. These are the type of people who make good leaders as they can also manage their time, have a strong work ethic, and set reasonable goals that all can obtain. They become part of the problem solving, rely on their discipline to see it through, have the patience to do so, and are rewarded with confidence when the desired result is apparent. It has to do with being relaxed and responsible at the same time, as well as being independent enough to work alone as the leader. All these traits the horse inherently has and gives to enrich the lives of those around him.
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